Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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