Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Did you just see the Batmobile???
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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