didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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