I want to stick my p in your. b.
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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