Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Randomize
