It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Randomize
