My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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