you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
ttyl tear gas
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
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