if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
