I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize