Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
