Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
Randomize