ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
