why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize