you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Randomize
