i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Randomize