umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
How naked do you want me to be?
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