In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Randomize
