don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
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