Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Randomize