I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
