I got chris browned last night
So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Randomize
