Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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