I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
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