I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
