The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I just want to make out with him forever
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Randomize
