He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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