I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
