I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
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