just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
