i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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