Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Randomize