So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize
