Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Randomize