I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I have so many feelings about this burrito
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
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