Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
This martini tastes like the bartender stirred it with his foreskin.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
