Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
only you would photoshop your dick
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
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