Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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