So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
