my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
