Where are you?
In a non slutty way
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize
