Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
