There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize