It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Randomize
