We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
You ate ashes out of my bong
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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