I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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