if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Randomize
