Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
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