My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize