i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
